What is your favorite form of physical exercise?
Exercise. The word alone brings to mind sweaty brows, aching muscles and the soul-crushing monotony of the treadmill. I am not saying I am allergic to physical exertion, although a mild case of exercise-induced hives would not entirely surprise me. I understand the benefits. I know that regular movement keeps the doctor away, boosts the happy brain chemicals and, in theory, helps me fit into my favorite pair of jeans.
The trouble is that I am a busy person. My brain is a constantly whirring machine of creative genius, or at least that is what I tell myself. I have blog posts to write, LinkedIn connections to cultivate and the ever-present lure of the social media scroll. Burpees and lunges cannot compete with witty comments to craft and industry trends to analyze.
My ideal workout involves lifting a hefty mug of coffee to my lips while navigating the treacherous terrain of my overflowing inbox. I would also like a brisk walk to the fridge for a snack to count as cardio. And there is the intense finger workout I get from typing up these insightful blog posts. You are welcome.
Unfortunately, my sedentary lifestyle is starting to catch up with me. My posture resembles a melting candle, my stamina rivals that of a sloth on a particularly lazy Sunday, and my attempts at “athleticism” usually end in embarrassing mishaps involving furniture, small pets, or both.
So, dear readers, I have come to a realization: I need help. Not the professional kind, although I would consider a personal trainer who accepts payment in witty blog posts. I need your help. I need you, my loyal and supportive audience, to hold me accountable.
Consider this my public declaration of war against my couch potato tendencies. I, the writer of this humble blog, vow to incorporate more physical activity into my daily routine, and I am enlisting you as my fitness sergeants.
Here is how you can help:
- The Virtual Cheerleading Squad: Leave encouraging comments on my posts reminding me to get moving. Motivational quotes, funny GIFs of exercising animals and personalized workout challenges are all acceptable.
- The Gentle Nudge: If I have not mentioned any form of exercise in a while, which is likely, feel free to drop a subtle hint in the comments section. A not-so-subtle brick will also do.
- The Accountability Partner: If you are feeling particularly ambitious, we could become virtual workout buddies. We can share our fitness goals, track our progress or lack of it, and offer each other support, with a little healthy competition on the side.
You may be wondering what kind of exercise I will actually do. Excellent question. I am still figuring that out, and I am open to suggestions.
Here are a few contenders (with my completely unbiased commentary):
- Yoga: Sounds relaxing, but I doubt I have the patience to hold a downward dog for longer than it takes to check my Instagram feed.
- Running: The thought of willingly putting myself through that kind of torture makes me want to take a nap.
- Dancing: Now we are talking. This could be fun, provided there is good music and nobody is watching.
- Swimming: I do enjoy the water, but the whole swimsuit situation is a bit daunting.
- Hiking: Nature is great and all, but what if I encounter a spider? Or worse, a lack of cell service?
As you can see, I am still in the “exploration” phase of my fitness journey. But with your help, I am confident that I can find a form of exercise I do not completely despise. At the very least, I can learn to tolerate one for the sake of my health and the amusement of my readers.
Now, if you will excuse me, I can hear the couch calling, and a new season of my favorite show has just dropped. I will be back soon with an update on my fitness adventures, or misadventures, as the case may be. Wish me luck.
